Two ways to ask the question

Monday, June 29, 2009 ·

Pay attention to the way that you ask a question. There are two ways, using exactly the same words, which carry completely different motives. By paying attention to the way you ask the question, you can double check your motives, which helps keep you on the right track.

Why are there only men at the upper levels of my company!!!

Why are there only men at the upper levels of my company???

The first question demonstrates frustration and anger, foot stamping at the way things are. Whenever you ask a question with this motive, perhaps you're not really looking for an answer. Perhaps your main motive is to rale against the world, shaking your virtual fists at invisible enemies. It doesn't get you very far.

The second question, however, demonstrates a genuine curiosity, a thoughtful wonder at the way things are. Whenever you ask a question with this motive, you are actually asking for an answer. If you ask the second question of another person, you might gain some insight. If you ask the second question thoughtfully, inwardly, you might gain some insight as well, from your intuition.

Intuition comes to you through your heart. Ideas occur, fully formed. It may take some time to put words around the idea, to explore the nuances, but it's all there, ready for your contemplation.

Are there mostly men at the top levels of your company? Why do you think that might be?

I've pondered this question, and the answer that comes to me is that men do business differently than women. Or to put that another way, women do business differently than men.

Network marketing is a field predominately composed of women. Look around at any of your conventions or training meetings; are there mostly men or women sitting around you? And then looking up at the stage, are there mostly men or women sitting up there?

The techniques that we learn in network marketing are changing; the industry is becoming more and more solidly structured around relationships. Rather than handing out 20 brochures to strangers every day and hoping someone will call you back, we're finding that what really works is to call up a friend and sit down and have chat over a cup of tea. Relationships.

So why are there more men at the top levels of your company? Because women are starting to come into our own, and we're doing it by discovering what works for us. We're changing the structure of network marketing a step at a time, which is our nature. Because we're gentle and caring and nurturing; because we include others in our success; because we embrace a balanced life.

We're getting to the top levels of our companies. Things are changing. Look how much things have changed in the last 20 years. Think about how much things will change in the next 20 years.

None of that would have occurred to me if I had demanded Why are there so many men at the top levels of these companies!!! I would have continued on, frustrated and angry, never getting any answers.

I know a lot more now, because my motive has shifted. I'm happier now, not because I've learned to be content with what I have, but because I'm content with the journey that is taking me where I want to go. It's all about the journey; the goal is simply what happens along the way.


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